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Literature Text
I fall for you hard. But the fall lasts an eternity. It never ends. It's just a straight drop down. Every second is spent thinking about you. About when ill see you next. When I talk to you again. When I sit next to you.
It makes me feel weightless when you smile back and stare into my eyes. I know you mean it just as much as I do.
You rub my knees, you kiss my arm, you massage my back, and, eventually, you slip my empty hand into yours. The feeling I get is unlike any other. I've never experienced it. In that moment, it is as though I'm actually wanted by someone in this world. I'm not looked past, not ignored....I'm needed....wanted.....cared for....and my life is good. I smile, I remember the feeling of being happy. I'm on top of my world with nothing to drag me down.........until you tie a thousand pound weight to my leg and send me crashing down.
That look you gave me only a day ago......you now give it to her.
That smile? It's hers too.
That hug? Hers.
You? Her property.
I'm once again left at the back door with a lock on my heart and hand cuffs on my wrists.
Not wanted. Not needed. Not cared for. Not loved.
Abused.
Used.
I give up. I don't care. It doesn't mean anything.
The next kid in line comes and takes full reign.
He holds my hip, grabs my hand, hugs me, tries to get sexually involved in my life. Worst thing is, I only stop his sexual motives. I allow him to do everything else.
I have let myself go.
I don't want to be loved, needed, cared for.
But at the same time, I desperately desire to be.
It makes me feel weightless when you smile back and stare into my eyes. I know you mean it just as much as I do.
You rub my knees, you kiss my arm, you massage my back, and, eventually, you slip my empty hand into yours. The feeling I get is unlike any other. I've never experienced it. In that moment, it is as though I'm actually wanted by someone in this world. I'm not looked past, not ignored....I'm needed....wanted.....cared for....and my life is good. I smile, I remember the feeling of being happy. I'm on top of my world with nothing to drag me down.........until you tie a thousand pound weight to my leg and send me crashing down.
That look you gave me only a day ago......you now give it to her.
That smile? It's hers too.
That hug? Hers.
You? Her property.
I'm once again left at the back door with a lock on my heart and hand cuffs on my wrists.
Not wanted. Not needed. Not cared for. Not loved.
Abused.
Used.
I give up. I don't care. It doesn't mean anything.
The next kid in line comes and takes full reign.
He holds my hip, grabs my hand, hugs me, tries to get sexually involved in my life. Worst thing is, I only stop his sexual motives. I allow him to do everything else.
I have let myself go.
I don't want to be loved, needed, cared for.
But at the same time, I desperately desire to be.
I know it's cheesy but its true. I'm at the point of letting go. Tired of feeling this way.
© 2013 - 2024 Terminateher-97
Comments2
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If there is a guy, doing things like that and pressuring you into things you don't want to do then get out of that relationship. It's not worth something like that and also, your body is your own and you should be in control of it, not anyone else.
Don't worry about guys. There's plenty of time for them concentrate on other things that make you happy.
Don't worry about guys. There's plenty of time for them concentrate on other things that make you happy.